Tax Lawyer's Blog

Last week I received this interesting letter from a reader named Kenneth Snipps:

June 14, 2010

Pappas & Associates
930 Woodcock Rd
Suite 227
Orlando, FL 32803

Dear Sir or Madam,

My name is Kenneth and I need your help regarding a tax matter

Several months ago my neighbor Mr. Biggs told me there are hidden messages embedded within the tax code that, when deciphered in Aramaic, form phrases foretelling historical events such as a blind fumbling guy being the head of New York State. Is that true?

If so that is amazing and I need to buy a copy of the tax code like right now so I can look for future historical events. Therefore, please, please, please let me know. You guys are the best.

I have to go. I think my home has a radon leak because the alarm is going wee-ew, wee-ew, wee-we. No lie. The sound is unbearable and I can’t find my ear phones or my keys. What should I do? Seriously.

Thank you for reading and responding to my letter.

Your friend,

Kenneth

I’m sure Kenneth is just having a little fun here. Nevertheless, I’m glad I had my hazmat suit on when I opened his envelope.¹

Footnotes:

¹  According to Times Argus.com, Mr. Snipps has a reputation for writing these kinds of prank letters. Some of them are very funny, like this one he sent to the Mayor of Barre, Connecticut:

Dear Sir or Madam,

My name is Kenneth Snipps and I have a few ideas on how you people can make residents feel at home when contacting the police department.

Okay, where even to start?

First, a welcome mat would be nice. Maybe with a big smiley face on it, like the one in front of my house.

Next candies. A big jar of them right when you walk in would just make people happy. But include a pair of tongs for extracting the candies for sanitary reasons. And make sure you wash the tongs occasionally too. People like that.

Now the big problem … the bathrooms.

They are usually so cold and unwelcoming. When I enter a bathroom, I like to be overwhelmed with the fragrance of exotic herbs and incense. Would it kill you people to buy a little potpourri?

One other thing, some throw rugs with a hospitality-type pattern would be nice too.

I hope you don’t think it forward of me to offer these suggestions because I am not looking for trouble here. I am just trying to help.

Thank you for reading and responding to my letter.

Your friend,

Kenneth Snipps

P.S. If you implement my ideas will I receive a reward? That would be good because I could use the cash.

Bookmark & Share: