Tax Lawyer's Blog

This is the first installment of the tax lawyer’s Tax Lexicon.

1. Tax Audit - An enhanced interrogation technique performed by government officials on suspected terrorists and enemy combatants housed at Gitmo. Tax audits are often done in conjunction with the use of creepy insects.
2. IRS Agent – A person with a deep-seated and long-standing grudge against mankind for not having been invited to the high school prom or picked when choosing sides for basketball.
3. Offer-In-Compromise- A joint venture between the IRS and tax scammers whereby the IRS obtains detailed information about the character and location of a taxpayer’s assets and the tax scammer receives a fee for providing that information to it.
4. Depreciation – The decline in a taxpayer’s net worth caused by reckless and profligate tax increases.
5. NOL Carryback – The amount of loss on a taxpayer’s current year tax return that can be used to recover taxes paid in prior years the claiming of which triggers an audit of the taxpayers’ current year tax return.
6. Tax Increase – A bonus paid by taxpayers to government employees who have increased the deficit and failed to balance the budget. Identical to the AIG bonuses except these employees are not publicly shamed for accepting them.
7. Accuracy-Related Penalty – A penalty for filing an inaccurate tax return that is assessed against taxpayers who have no financial training or background, but that is not assessed against the U.S. Treasury Secretary.
8. Tax Evasion -An egregious and immoral criminal act whereby a taxpayer attempts to keep more of the money he has earned through his own sweat than the government thinks he should keep.
9. Tax Mistake – Same as above when done by a high-ranking government official.
10. Tax Policy – New tax laws written by elected officials who do not understand the old tax laws.
11. Earned Income Credit – A reward given by the government to those who do not pay taxes that is paid for from the funds of those who do pay taxes. 
12. Tax Simplification – Changes in the U.S. tax structure that increase the size of the tax code thereby allowing me to raise my fees.
13. Estate Tax - The confiscation of the wealth of a no-longer breathing taxpayer mainly because he is too dead to object.
14. Loophole – The obscure tax provision you benefit from.
15. Good tax planning – The obscure tax provision I benefit from.

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